Cycle of violence

From the Domestic Violence Handbook INCIDENT: Any type of abuse occurs (Physical, sexual, emotional.>>>>>>>>>>>>> RECONCILIATION: *Abuser apologizes for abuse *Promises it will never happen again *Blames victim for provoking abuse *Denies abuse took place or that it wasn´t as bad as the victim claims *Gift giving by abuser>>>>>>>>>>>>>> CALM: *Incident is "forgotten" *No abuse is taking place * Some promises made during reconciliation are being met *Hope on the part of the victim that the abuse is over.>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> TENSION BUILDING: *Tension starts to build *Minor incidents begin *Breakdown of communication *Victim feels the need to placate the abuser *Tension becomes unbearable >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Incident: Any type of abuse occurs The cycle can happen hundreds of times in an abusive relationship. Each stage lasts a different anount of time in a relationship, with the total cycle taking from a few hours to a year or more to complete It is important to remember that not all domestic violence relationships "fit" the cycle. Often, as time goes on, the reconciliation and calm stages may disappear.